divorce_hazards3

Few know how difficult, even traumatic and definitely time consuming the legal PROCEDURE of divorce is even if both married partners consent and there is no contention about child or property.
keywords:
contested cases, mutual consent, staying separately, decree, petition, annulment, Indian Divorce Act, the Parsi Marriage and Divorce Act, Muslim Marriage Act, family court in Bandra (Mumbai, India), Japanese Divorce, Federal Welfare Reform (USA), French Civil Code, Federal Divorce Act (Canada)
***Swati Despande/TNN in her report in the Times of India states, "Getting a divorce will take at least 18 months from the day you start living separately".Click here to read
divorce_hazards1 and here to read
divorce_hazards2.


HINDU
The Hindu Marriage Act governs marriages between Hindus, and the Special Marriage Act governs both inter- and same-faith marriages. The Act requires that the couple show that they have been living separately for at least 1 year before they knock the doors of the court. Only after showing the stipulated duration of separation a divorce petition can be filed. The decree of divorce that sets the couple free takes another 6 months. The court keeps the plea alive for 18 months in the hope of possible reconciliation.
CHRISTIANS
The Indian Divorce Act deals with marriages of Christians. Christians have to show two years of separation before initiating the legal process. Similarly two years of separation is a must in England.
MUSLIM
The Muslim Marriage Act(1939) allows Muslim women to file for divorce in the family court.
PARSI
There is no waiting period of six months after a petition has been filed for divorce by mutual consent, though the period of separation of . The divorce court for Parsis is Bombay High Court, which periodically appoints a special judge to hear divorce pleas.
STAYING SEPARATELY
As per Supreme Court of India, the couple could be considered to be residing separately even if they are staying in the same household.
ANNULMENT
Marriages can also be annulled; this means that the court certifies that there has not been any marriage at all.
Women usually ask for annulment on grounds of

1. impotency,
2. non consummation of marriage,
3. mental disorder,
4. insanity,
5. fraud and deception.

Men usually ask for annulment if wife is

1. frigid or
2. is already pregnant at the time of the marriage or
3. suffers from a mental disorder.

If people are considered mature enough at 18 years to be able to vote a leader for the nation, to be able to drive, and if they are considered mature enough to marry, why are they not considered mature enough to get a divorce immediately rather than wait for 18 months, when they both seek divorce with mutual agreement?

Dr. Ashok Koparday

ADULTERY
Adultery used to be a commonly cited ground. But it is difficult to prove as it requires a co-respondent and lawyers advise against it.
CONTESTED CASES
Either the husband or wife individually file for divorce.
Why women seek divorce?
One of the commonest reasons is cruelty — both physical and mental — and desertion.
Other grounds can be mental illness or disorder, venereal diseases, AIDS, other virulent and incurable diseases, unknown whereabouts for seven years or renunciation of the world by spouse.
Why men seek divorce?
The usual reasons for seeking divorce by men are cruelty, insult, humiliation, wife refuses to wear mangalsutra, throws a fit, misbehaves in public, is hysterical, screams, bangs her head.
JAPAN

The Japanese divorce by mutual consent is one of the easiest divorces in the world. The spouses can go to the town hall and simply register their divorce. The reasons do not matter but they need to be clear about which spouse has the custody of a minor.
ENGLAND

A two-year separate stay is a must for divorces by consent.
The couple can live in the same house, but they have to show they ate and slept separately.
FRANCE

France does not have separation period but you have to be married for at least 6 months before you file a divorce plea.
There is also a three-to-nine-month probation period before a court confirms a divorce.
The French Civil Code permits divorce for 4 different reasons:
1]mutual consent (60 per cent of divorces);
2]acceptance;
3]separation of two years; and
4]because of a partner’s “fault’’ (accounting for most of the other 40 per cent).
UNITED STATES

The Federal Welfare Reform passed in 1980 has stipulated the creation of child-support guidelines in all 50 states in the 1980s. The duration of separation is 1 year.
Except in Maryland and Pennsylvania, where the wait is 2 years if there is not mutual consent and 1 year if there mutual consent.
Washington D C is more liberal and imposes only a six-month separation period.
CANADA



The Federal Divorce Act of 1968 standardised the rules of divorce across Canada and introduced the no-fault concept as a ground for divorce as well as fault-based grounds, including adultery, cruelty and desertion.
Thanks to Swati Despande
Courtesy:
***The Times of India, Mumbai, Thursday December 20, 2007,
'Times City'
report titled Parting Isn't Easy By Swati Despande|TNN s.despande@timesgroup.com

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newly-wed-husband-refuses-sex

Unconsummated Marriage is when sexual intercourse does not happen.
One reason is that husband refuses sexual intimacy, though he is cordial in all other ways. The reasons. The Solution.


The girl wonders why, though being a man, the guy does not initiate sexual intimacy. He may be fiance, the boy whom she, fiancee, is going to get married or more often it is the newly wed husband. There are ONLY 3 possible reasons why husband or fiance (boy with whom you are going to marry) avoids physical closeness.

1

HOMOSEXUAL
He is Gay , that is homosexual.

2

SEX PROBLEM
He believes he has some sexual problem. THIS CAN BE TREATED BY SEX THERAPIST OR COUNSELOR

3

3rd REASON DOES NOT EXIST
There are practically only 2 above mentioned reasons.
If you insist I may say the 3rd reason to avoid intimacy could be rigid social customs, orthodox upbringing. Contacting the girl before marriage is not allowed in their tradition, community or caste.

HOW DO YOU KNOW HE IS AVOIDING PHYSICAL CLOSENESS

HER SIXTH SENSE
She starts noticing, her sixth sense tells her something is amiss.
ALL HER CONFRONTATIONS ARE MET BY

LAME EXCUSES
Work pressure, no time, tired, want to sleep, not well, head ache, busy day, tomorrow have to get up early, religious excuses, like priest or clergy has said not to do that - sex - till X'mas or till a year. He bursts into arguments and says why are you so interested in sex. Sex is not the only thing in life. It can be done after marriage. We do not want a baby so till one year no sex.

SIGNS
The conversations on telephone are not daily, usually less than 10 - 15 minutes, His talk is about dull topics and unromantic. She usually sulks and expresses that she is angry because he does not call often.
He gives excuses like study/work pressure.

He often avoids holding hands, forget about kissing.

He avoids taking you out alone. In all trips or holidays other family members or friends are present. If there is some time or privacy he fills the time with boring talk or says he is tired and wants to sleep or read or watch TV or sits with the Computer or takes up some office work to do.

HOW TO CHECK
1
Find if he has married late.
Usually despite their parents persuasion they delay marriage giving excuses. When the age is nearing 30 years, that is at age of 28 or 29 when all his stock of excuses are over, he has to give in to parents pressure and he agrees to marry.
2
Find if he was forced to marry due to family or society pressure.
3
Find if has or had close BOY friends
4
Any sms, emals, chats, telephone conversations that suggest he is in love with someone else.
5
He is very gentle and loving. You think he is the best husband, best friend, best guy you have met, but _ _ _. Except for his avoiding sexual intimacy he is very loving, eager to fulfill your every desire.
6
Find if he has fear of failure in doing sex
7
Find if he (most often) erroneously believes that he has a sexual problem and cannot do sex.
Wherever the word FIND is used it means the girl will very politely plead and inquire. Persuade him to tell the truth by being firm yet kind. Most often they burst with arguments and anger and it is difficult to stay polite with them in this matter.

HOW TO KNOW IF HE IS BISEXUAL?
All the signs of homosexual are present, yet he does foreplay, but stops at a certain limit and avoids sexual intercourse.
Investigate to find

ARE THERE INVESTIGATIONS TO MEDICALLY
PROVE HE IS HOMOSEXUAL OR HAS SEX PROBLEM?
No. There is no medical test to detect or confirm sexual inclination of a person.
Hypnosis or Sodium Pentothal (NARCOANALYSIS)Truth Test is not feasible since they require the person's willingness to undergo the test. They are not done to find homosexuality or to change homosexual attraction.

---

SOLUTIONS
Homosexual WE CANNOT TREAT.

Bisexual TREATMENT IS POSSIBLE

Sexual Dysfunctions or Sex Problems THIS CAN BE DEFINITELY TREATED AND RESOLVED.

SOME MORE DETAILS
IF YOU ARE STILL INTERESTED IN READING FURTHER

NORMAL PATTERN TO BE EXPECTED
[1] Telephone calls last for one hour or more.
Bonding is good. Friendship is great. This is called ROMANCE. It is the best period of the couple's life.

[2] Sexual passion being irresistible the boy INITIATES (begins)sexual intimacy when the slightest opportunity is present.

[3]
If married FOREPLAY is invariably present. It is absent if the husband is homosexual, bisexual or he believes he has sex problem. Even if present it is NOT INITIATED by the husband. The wife has to initiate.

WHAT IS FOREPLAY
Lovers meet hold each other, begin hugging, kissing, caressing. This is called foreplay. All the sexually pleasurable part of lovemaking that precedes sexual intercourse is called foreplay. The characteristic difference in love-making between boys and girls is summed up in this short dictum.

GIRL GIVES SEX TO GET LOVE;
THE BOY GIVES LOVE TO GET SEX.

SEX BEGINS from the time the two lovers eyes meet, ears listen to each other on the cell phone, chatting on the internet. as when listening to each others voice on the cell phone or words spilling in chat on the internet Passionate sexual


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ASK THE DOCTOR

divorce_hazards-1

To
The Editor,
Times of India,
Mumbai
Sir:

90% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave the house.
The rest kiss their house goodbye when they leave the wife

Divorce damages social environment. Bonding becomes difficult because 'trust' is contaminated.

Sex hungry roving eyes are added in the society we live.

Sexual desires can be so compulsive that the divorced guy ensnares the gullible by giving false promises. It is late when realization dawns that she has been 'used'.

No doubt risk of sexual harassment at office increases.

Faith in 'Marriage' being a special bond to be coveted and cherished life long goes to the dogs.

Which university is going to sponsor me to study pscyho sexual impact of divorce on on society?

Dr.Ashok Koparday
Mumbai
Top News,
Times Online, UK
The Age, Australia
Melbourne Herald Sun, Australia
Sify, India
All news channels published the study of the damage caused to environment due to divorce.

divorce_hazards-2

In 2005, divorced households in the United States spent as much as 56 per cent more on electricity and water per person than married households and used up to 61 per cent more resources per person than they did before the separation took place.
more than 73 billion kilowatt hours of electricity and 627 billion gallons of water could have been saved in the US.

In the United States, the proportion of divorced households jumped from five percent in 1970 to 15 percent in 2000, and numbers have surged even in China where divorce has not been traditionally as common, the study said.

In 2005, US divorced households spent as much as 56 percent more on electricity and water per person than married households, and used up to 61 percent more resources per person than they did before the separation took place.

If divorced households operated with an efficiency similar to married households, "more than 73 billion kilowatt-hours of electricity and 627 billion gallons of water could have been saved in the US," it said.

Researchers surveyed 3,283 homes in the United States between 2001 and 2005, and found that divorcing households registered a 61 percent increase in the number of rooms per person, compared with six percent increase in households that remained married.
12/3/2007 7:36 PM
90% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave the house.
The rest kiss their house goodbye when they leave the wife.
Now they can make the best of a bad marriage in the name of being environmentally friendly.
Scientists have quantified for the first time the extent to which divorce damages the environment. The researchers found that the combined use of electricity across the two new households created rose 53% while water use was up by 42%.
Across America – one of 12 countries studied – divorced households used 73 billion kilowatt-hours of electricity in 2005 that could have been saved if the families had not split up. That is equivalent to about a fifth of Britain’s consumption.
Broken couples also increase demand for housebuilding and infrastructure such as new roads. “The global trend of soaring divorce rates has created more households with fewer people, has taken up more space and has gobbled up more energy and water,” said Jianguo Liu of Michigan University, who carried out the latest research.
The study, to be published tomorrow in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, found that the average number of rooms per household was between 33% and 95% higher for divorced couples than for married ones.
Liu also calculated that America now has an extra 38.5m rooms in houses and apartments built to meet the demand for more accommodation generated by divorce over the past three decades.
The growth of single-person households is also damaging the environment. Research published in the journal Environment, Development and Sustainability found that:
- One-person households are the biggest consumers of energy, land and household goods, such as washing machines, refrigerators, TVs and stereos, per capita
- They consume 38% more products, 42% more packaging, 55% more electricity and 61% more gas per capita than four-person households
- People living alone create 1½ tons of waste annually compared with a ton by those in households of four or more.

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sex-cancer-2

Lesley Fallowfield, a professor of psycho-oncology at Sussex University, said that because sex is a particularly important way for young couples to cement their relationship, a cancer diagnosis that affects a couple's sex life might be very damaging.


'Certain cancers mean more divorces'
27 Sep 2007, 1357 hrs IST , AP
People who develop cervical or testicular cancer may face another harsh reality: they are more likely to get divorced, a new study says.

Women with cervical cancer had a 40 per cent higher chance of getting divorced than other women.

In research presented on Thursday at a meeting of the European Cancer Organisation, Norwegian experts found that women with cervical cancer had a 40 per cent higher chance of getting divorced than other women.

Men with testicular cancer were 20 per cent more likely to get divorced than similar men without cancer. Both types of cancer are curable and mainly affect young people.
"Sex could have something to do with this," said Lesley Fallowfield, a professor of psycho-oncology at Sussex University who was not connected to the study. "If men and women with cervical or testicular cancer aren't having sex with their partners, that may be a problem."

For nearly two decades, the study looked at 2.8 million people in Norway, comparing the divorce rates of 215,000 cancer survivors to those in couples with no cancer.
Shortcoming of the study:
They did not ask couples about the reasons for the divorces, but only looked at marriage and divorce registration data.
"It seems to be worse for your marriage to get cancer early," said Astri Syse, an epidemiologist at the Norwegian Cancer Registry who led the study. But Syse said that it was only cervical and testicular cancer that produced a spike in divorces. Other types of cancer did not result in more divorces.

7 out of 10 women DO NOT LEAVE their husbands though they have cancer of testis at age 20 years

7 out of 10 men leave their wives who have cancer of the lower part of womb at 20 years age

Age 20 years with Cervical Cancer in Women 69 %
Age 20 years with Testicular Cancer in Men 34 %

Normal husbands in Norway who divorce even at 60 year age 16 %

(Little less than women)

Normal wives divorce even at 60 years 19 %

Age also helped. At age 20, women were 69 per cent more likely to get divorced if they had cervical cancer. But by age 60, that risk dropped to 19 per cent. The same trend was seen in men with testicular cancer. At 20, men with testicular cancer had an increased divorce risk of 34 per cent. That fell to 16 per cent for men aged 60.

Experts thought that the break-ups could be due both to the cancers, and to the youth of the couples involved. Older couples might be more committed to each other and less likely to get divorced even when faced with a life-threatening disease.

Fallowfield said that couples affected by cancer early on in their marriage might be more likely to divorce if they had not yet had children, or if the illness caused financial hardship.

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sex-celebrity-bertrand-russell-1

Though free celebrity sex tape, sex video, sex scene, sex movie are ranked highest today, the sex story in the
Private Life of Bertrand Russell, which you are reading is engaging and enlightening. The Philosopher, Mathematician, and Rationalist (born: May 18, 1872 died: February 2, 1970 aged 97 years) who won the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1950 had not only radical views, but lead personal sex life that was ahead of his time.
Here is the beginning of my post.

Russell's mother Catherine (née Stanley) was from an aristocratic family, and was the sister of Rosalind Howard, Countess of Carlisle.
Bertrand Russell's father, Viscount Amberley, was an atheist and consented to his wife's affair with their children's tutor, the biologist Douglas Spalding. Both were early advocates of birth control at a time when this was considered scandalous.
Russell's father died of bronchitis following a long period of depression in January 1876.

Frank and Bertrand were placed in the care of their staunchly Victorian grandmother, the Countess Russell (née Lady Frances Elliot), who was the dominant family figure for the rest of Russell's childhood and youth.

The countess was from a Scottish Presbyterian family, and successfully petitioned a British court to set aside a provision in Amberley's will requiring the children to be raised as agnostics. Despite her religious conservatism, she held progressive views in other areas (accepting Darwinism and supporting Irish Home Rule), and her influence on Bertrand Russell's outlook on social justice and standing up for principle remained with him throughout his life - her favourite Bible verse, 'Thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil.' (Exodus 23:2), became his mantra. However, the atmosphere at Pembroke Lodge was one of frequent prayer, emotional repression and formality; Frank reacted to this with open rebellion, but the young Bertrand learned to hide his feelings.
Russell's adolescence was thus very lonely, and he often contemplated suicide. He remarked in his autobiography that his keenest interests were in sex, religion and mathematics, and that only the wish to know more mathematics kept him from suicide. He was educated at home by a series of tutors, and he spent countless hours in his grandfather's library.

His brother Frank introduced him to the work of Euclid, which transformed Russell's life.

Love Marriage Despite Opposition
He soon fell in love with the puritanical, high-minded Alys, who was a graduate of Bryn Mawr College near Philadelphia, and, contrary to his grandmother's wishes, he married her in December 1894.

How Russell ditched his wife?
Their marriage began to fall apart in 1902 when it occurred to Russell, while he was out on his bicycle, that he no longer loved her; they divorced nineteen years later, after a lengthy period of separation. Alys pined for him for these years and continued to love Russell for the rest of her life.

Bertrand Russell's Affairs
During this period, Russell had passionate (and often simultaneous) affairs with a number of women, including Lady Ottoline Morrell and the actress Lady Constance Malleson.

Romance with Dora
Russell and his flame Dora were together in China and Japan. On the couple's return to England in 1921, Dora Black was five months pregnant, and Russell arranged a hasty divorce from Alys, marrying Dora six days after the divorce was finalised. Their children were John Conrad Russell, 4th Earl Russell and Katharine Jane Russell (now Lady Katharine Tait). Russell supported himself during this time by writing popular books explaining matters of physics, ethics and education to the layman. Together with Dora, he also founded the experimental Beacon Hill School in 1927. After he left the school in 1932, Dora continued it until 1943.

Extramarital Affair of Dora
Russell's marriage to Dora grew increasingly tenuous, and it reached a breaking point over her having two children with an American journalist, Griffin Barry.

Russell's third wife
In 1936, he took as his third wife an Oxford undergraduate named Patricia ("Peter") Spence, who had been his children's governess since the summer of 1930.

Flashback
The Principles of Mathematics soon made Russell world famous in his field. published in 1910.

Bertrand Russell's view on Religion
Religion is based, I think, primarily and mainly upon fear. It is partly the terror of the unknown and partly, as I have said, the wish to feel that you have a kind of elder brother who will stand by you in all your troubles and disputes. […] A good world needs knowledge, kindliness, and courage; it does not need a regretful hankering after the past or a fettering of the free intelligence by the words uttered long ago by ignorant men.
– Bertrand Russell, Why I Am Not a Christian and Other Essays on Religion and Related Subjects

One who believes as I do, that free intellect is the chief engine of human progress, cannot but be fundamentally opposed to Bolshevism as much as to the Church of Rome. The hopes which inspire communism are, in the main, as admirable as those instilled by the Sermon on the Mount, but they are held as fanatically and are as likely to do as much harm.
– Bertrand Russell, The Practice and Theory of Bolshevism, 1920

And here is the rest of it.