smart-things-to-say

Specially Contributed by Sangita.
How ONE sentence makes a difference.

Martin wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Martin looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table.

'Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!'

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot
breakfast and the morning newspaper. His teenage son is also at the table, eating. Martin asks,

'Son, what happened last night?' His son says,

'Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door.'

Confused, Martin asks,

'So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?' His son replies,

'O
h, that! Apparently Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said,

Get your hands off me, bitch! I'm married!'

Moral of the Story
Self-induced hangover -- $100.00
Broken furniture -- $2,000.00
Breakfast -- $10.00
Saying The Right Thing to your wife when you are Drunk- PRICELESS!
The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends and no investment on the street pays larger dividends

Source:
Sent by Sangita

Dr. Ashok Koparday
MBBS, FC SEPI
Medical Director
Samadhan India
Center for Therapy, Education, Research in
Sex, Marriage, Relationships

Ex. Teaching Faculty
Seth G. S. Medical College and K. E. M. Hospital and
Grant Medical College and Sir J. J. Group of Hospitals
University of Mumbai, India

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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have never heard of this and I am 47 years old. I am recently remarried and my new husband masterbates while i am laying next to him asleep then wipes his sperm aggressively through my hair and then on my body. He has done this a lot and only when he thinks I am sleeping. I dont understand it when I am a beautiful woman and all he has to do is wake me or touch me or SOMETHING and i will sexually respond. I also recently found out he is going to websites on line looking at porn and also sites where you "Meet Horny Woman in your area" kind of stuff. When I ask him about it he denies it. So this morning he did it again. Before he leaves for work he masturbates in the other room this time (usually he waits until i am alseep then puts on some aggressive Independent Film Channel dark porn stuff and then does it next to me but this time he did it in the bathroom then came out and wiped his sperm all over me then happily got ready for work. HELP... is this normal... should I be afraid. Ive caught him with pics of girls butts on his cell phone too. I dont know what to do? ~EdieMarie

Anonymous said...

Hello Edie [name fictitious],
Apart from sexual pattern described, how is his behavior in all other matters?

All the stuff you mentioned that he does, except the wiping of semen ("_ _ _wipes his sperm aggressively through my hair and then on my body._ _ "), is what men typically do for sexual pleasure. He has been accustomed to doing it for several years, even prior to marriage. It is neither harmful nor abnormal.

His sexual requirements seem to be more, so just sexual intercourse probably does not totally satisfy him. Masturbation is healthy. Masturbation is better than his going to other women. He is unlikely to be actually going to other women. Any porn site you open has this information "_ _ _"Meet Horny Woman in your area" _ _ _ _" persistently displayed.

Suggestion:
Do not try to catch him as though he has done something bad. This will make him continue doing it secretly.
Rather show (appear to be) interested in knowing what all things are there when he is watching porn site. Appear curious to know about what masturbation is so whatever he does you will know and he will answer questions willingly.

The smearing of semen on hair and body is not common. You may take a bath after this if you wish. It is medically harmless. If it gives him joy and you begin to accept it he will be more relaxed in your presence and willing to give you full pleasure, as well as modify any pattern according to your likes/dislikes.

Men need to know more about giving satisfaction to women by methods like romance, foreplay and other delicate manners.


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Dr. Ashok Koparday

Please let me know if you have any additional questions or issues.

Anonymous said...

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