Erectile Dysfunction (previously called
IMPOTENCE) causes such a marked dissatisfaction that it can lead to severe distress amounting to depression and can even lead to considerable impairment in work and relationships.

A boy/man/guy afflicted with ED (Erectile Dysfunction) can have difficulty that spills in to other areas of his life (aspects other than sexual life) 24 x 7. The mind becomes unquiet even if he imagines he has ED, that is in the absence of proven ED. ED, unfortunately, becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.


What this means is
a man may not really have ED, but the doubt, the apprehension, the belief, just the imagination, fear or worry of ED (impotence) can lead to impotence/erectile dysfunction.

The other causes of situational ED is


*ignorance, *inadequate sexual arousal (no mood)
*disturbance (some physical or emotional disturbance as having had a bad day or the mood is not just right).

Often in this type of ED the sexual act is mechanical (without enough sexual arousal) or forced attempt at sexual intercourse, that is, attempting sex in the absence of high sexual arousal, as in situations when sex is motivated mainly by intention of pregnancy or when the Doctor has recommended certain dates for sexual intercourse to facilitate conception or to avoid pregnancy.

It may also occur just because he/she believes he/she is expected to do sex (important situational reason) as on occasions such as the first night after wedding (Suhagrat) when he is really not prepared for it.

Fear of failure is a common cause of Erectile Dysfunction.
It is well known that PERFORMANCE ANXIETY causes impotence or failure to obtain or sustain erection.
If the boy (guy/man) is under pressure resulting from too much desire to impress her, example, as in extra marital affair (includes premarital affair) or during honey moon (wrongly believing that first impression is the last impression).

He may be stressed out due to high expectation from one self or lack of confidence of one's sexual ability or misconception, myth or wrong belief about genitals or their ability.

GOOD NEWS is almost often, especially under the guidance of an experienced counsellor (Sex Therapist), this man's ED is curable.

Situational Erectile Dysfunction (ED) is TEMPORARY inability in obtaining and or maintaining Erection good enough for satisfactory sexual intercourse.

Note that this ED is temporary and almost always curable even without medicines usually with the help of an expert marriage or sex counsellor.

Differential Diagnosis

In contrast to situational ED is ORGANIC ED, that is ED, which is because of causes such as actual damage caused by disease processes such as Diabetes or Hypertension. Thus, pathological process is implicated in the causation of Organic Erectile Dysfunction.



Dr. Ashok Koparday
is a marriage counselor and sex therapist practising in Mumbai.
Dr. Ashok Koparday
is a medical doctor who was teaching at Seth G. S. Medical College affiliated to Mumbai's K.E.M. Hospital, University of Mumbai.
Office:+91 9867788877


Nerves in the genital area

Sexual sensations are necessary for complete climax called ORGASM.
With the onset of sexual sensations, sensuous and erotic arousal goes on building in ecstatic excitement exploding into orgasm, the climax of sexual pleasure on sexy stimulation. This is facilitated by specific nerves in your body.

Which are these sex nerves?
These nerves may be affected in disease conditions thereby giving rise to sexual dysfunctions in men and women.
The nerves that communicate sexual pleasure in men and women are as follows.

transmits from the uterus and the cervix in women and from the prostate in men.

* PELVIC nerve - transmits from the vagina and cervix in women and from the rectum in both sexes.

* PUDENDAL nerve - transmits from the clitoris in women and from the scrotum and penis in men

* VAGUS nerve -

transmits from the cervix, uterus and vagina.

Compiled by Dr. Ashok Koparde (Koparday) the specialist sex doctor now practising in Mumbai. Dr. Ashok Koparde was in the teaching faculty of Seth G. S. Medical College and K.E.M. Hospital (the prestigious King Edward Memorial Hospital, Parel, Mumbai) of the University of Mumbai (Bombay), India.

What happens in the brain during an orgasm?

by Shanna Freeman

Website and copyright
There are not many differences between men's and women's brains when it comes to sex.

In both,***the brain region behind the left eye, called the lateral or bitofrontal cortex,***shuts down during orgasm.

Janniko R. Georgiadis, one of the researchers, said, "It's the seat of reason and behavioral control. But when you have an orgasm, you lose control" [source: LA Times ].

Dr. Gert Holstege stated that the brain during an orgasm looks much like the brain of a person taking heroin. He stated that "95 percent is the same" [source: Science News ].

Brain differences sex men women

There are some differences, however. When a woman has sex, a part of the brain stem called the
periaqueductal gray (PAG) is activated. The PAG controls the "flight or fight" response.
Women's brains also showed decreased activity in the amygdala and hippocampus, which deal with fear and anxiety. The team theorized that these differencesexisted because women have more of a need to feel safe and relaxed in order to enjoy sex.
In addition, the area of the cortex associated with pain was activated in women, which shows that there is a distinct connection between pain and pleasure.





Dr. Ashok Koparday
is a marriage counselor and sex therapist practising in Mumbai.
Dr. Ashok Koparday
is a medical doctor who was teaching at Seth G. S. Medical College affiliated to Mumbai's
K.E.M. Hospital, University of Mumbai.

Source(s): ,

Really scared for my first time intercourse ?

I don't have a clue on what to do! Don't know
how to suck people of? How do I know if he's reached an orgasm, how far does his ***** have to go inside me to reach an orgasm!!!!???!

- - - - - -
by Dr. Ashok Koparday, Ghatkopar East, Mumbai, Maharashtra, INDIA
Email: See:
- - - - -

You will know gradually. It is important that your boy friend respects you, is patient with you and does things (inserting in vagina) gently because it is your first time.
It is not important how deep it goes in vagina as long as it is pleasurable for you. All women do not get orgasm all the times they have sex. Orgasms are not essential everytime and a woman does get satisfied even in absence of orgasms. There is no rule other than the rule to follow your own and his pleasure. Some things like sucking 'p_ _ is' does turn some girls off initially.




Dr. Ashok Koparday Office:+91 9867788877
Email: ask [at] mydoctortells [dot] com
Sexologist, Mumbai
What is foreplay?


In layman's terms, it's everything that leads up to penetration. Cuddling, kissing, touching, oral, etc.


In human sexual behavior, foreplay is a set of intimate psychological and physical acts between two or more people, meant to build up sexual arousal. Foreplay takes place in preparation for sexual intercourse or another act meant to bring about mutual sexual gratification or orgasm.

Psychologically, foreplay lowers inhibitions and increases the emotional comfort level between partners. Physically, it helps to produce an erection in men, allowing them to penetrate an orifice, and it helps to promote vaginal lubrication in women, which allows penetration to take placecomfortably. Foreplay can take many forms, and can take place, up to a point at least, in public.This kiss has many of thecharacteristics of foreplay; whether or not kissing is foreplay depends on where the couple goes from here.

If the potential partner accepts the sexual invitation, foreplay has begun. Accepting the invitation is often indicated by reciprocating with similar behavior. Since these interactions are non-explicit, there can bemisunderstandings about whether an invitation has been extended and/or accepted. Whether advertent or not, this kind of miscommunication is often termed "leading someone on".

At some point, foreplay typically becomes physical. Simple and seemingly innocuous acts, such as straightening someone's clothing or hair, bumpinginto someone while walking, stroking someone's arm, or whispering in someone'sear can constitute foreplay. Holding hands, other touching (especially of the face), kissing, biting, massaging, or scratching any area of the body can all qualify as foreplay.

As the couple's degree of comfort and/or privacy increases, the level of intimacy in their actions usually does. More intimate examples include:

* deep tongue kissing (also known as French kissing)

* touching and massaging erogenous zones over clothing (also known as groping or petting)

* touching and massaging erogenous zones under clothing (also known as heavy-petting)

* rubbing together of partners' erogenous zones over clothing (also known as dry humping or grinding)

* undressing one's self orone's partner (also known as stripping)

These various examples are often combined; if foreplay doesn't lead to sexual intercourse, a session of such acts is sometimes called"petting" or "making out".

Direct manipulation of naked erogenous zones is almost always considered foreplay. In women, this includes stimulation of the clitorisand labia lips. In men, this includes stimulation of the penis and testicles.For both genders, this includes stimulation of nipples and anus. Stimulation can be achieved using a mouth, hands, sex toys (such as dildos or vibrators), or common household objects (such as feathers or ice cubes).

Safe sex practices can be incorporated as part of foreplay. If a condom or dental dam is going to beused, it can be applied in an erotic or playful way as part of the final stagesof foreplay. (Even if birth control is being handled by Pill or some other hormonal form, safe sex still requires protection against sexually transmitted diseases.)

Foreplay tends to become more purely physical as well as more intense as it proceeds. Foreplay reaches its peakin the moments just before intercourse, whenit lowers any remaining inhibitions and produces a strong mutual desire for penetration. Even at this point, some genital teasing may take place for a brief time, which marks foreplay's final seconds.

Sexual roleplaying, fetishactivities, and BDSM can also be considered foreplay, though they more commonly accompany sex rather than preceding it.


Anything you do; makingout, touching, etc, before you actually have sex.


Foreplay is "what happens before sex to get your both ready".

BUT I have found that I can get aroused without any sexual contact. Oftenjust holding hands or kissing. Sometimes it's just the way he puts his hand on my shoulder or arm as we are talking.

Unfortunately, most times we can't act on it:-( because we are in public places, kids are around, etc. So by the time we get alone, we have to have foreplay again.


Most of the answers I seeare what I would consider correct. Touching each other, no matter where, is foreplay. What turns on one person may not turn on another. I have seen some women be turned on just by kissing them, they would be turned on to the point of orgasm. And I have also seen some that only oral stimulation of the clit would turn them on. All people are different and respond differently. Foreplay is really up to each individual couple asto what they want and need from each other to be stimulated to the point of making love with each other. This question I have tried to answer must have been posted by a very young person. Most couples know the answers for this.


Foreplay is the most important part of the sexact. Without it you mightas well just go ahead andmasturbate and get on with life. I am speaking from the man's point of view for I am a man. firstyou must undress the lady slowly while gently kissing any bare skin exposed on the way. Now that young lady is completely naked start gently kissing mouth andneck slowly working your way down to the lovely breast which by they way is the door to females sex drive you bypass the breast you've blown it. Take your time on the breast gently sucking and rotating tongue around nipple after so many minutes continue on down gentlykissing till past the belly button(do not mess with this) go straight to the desert kiss her vagina and gently start licking start looking for the clitoris by now it will be swollen and moist if you've done everything right before arriving. While licking the clitoris also lick the rest of the vagina in between with free hands you should be squeezing buttocks gently and if she lets you getting her anus moist soyou can insert index finger very gently in her anus, this well give her max climax right before climax take other two fingers on other hand ensert in vagina while licking the clitoris (some men don't care for the smell so they hesitate to go down on a lady don't let this stop you breath through your mouth onlyand you can overcome this it's very important ina sexual relationship thatyou master this.)


Simply put, FOREPLAY is both partners stimulating each other with touching, kissing and heavy "petting". Thisis an important part of sex, because it gets both people in the "mood" and makes intercourse more enjoyable for both; during foreplay the female becomes "wet" inher vagina and that is LUBRICATION for enjoyable intercourse.


Foreplay is the best thingyou can do to your partner. Experiment withpenetration in different ways. Use oils and even food to spice things up a little. Trust me, women love foreplay...And of course do men, but they love anything associated to sex!


Plenty of foreplay is essential for 'good sex'. From a woman's point of view there are few things more unsatisfying and annoying than an impatient man, almost panting with lust, who treats sex like the 'HokeyCokey' - 'in-out, in-out, yashake it all about' ... This kind of thing leaves women unsatisfied and often sends them to the bathroom for an autoerotic 'hand job'. It really is unacceptable.

Long ago I had a very sophisticated girlfriend who was sexually highly experienced. She had a rule, which was, 'No penetration till you've made me O at least twice!' She added with a smile that it wasn't meant completely literally, but the general point was very clear! :)


Another Perspective

Foreplay may also have an important biological function. Humans are theonly primates that do nothave a Baculum , or bone in the male penis. Humans are the only male primates that must become psychologically aroused in order to become erect enough to penetrate the female. Foreplay, therefore, may be an important aspect in stimulating the male.



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